April232014
April222014

Anonymous asked: So my brother and I are in our mid-20s. He's just a year older than I am and I'm a gay male survivor. I had to tell him what happened to me, but about a week before I had to tell my story he came up behind me to mess with me and I don't know if it's the right description but he was basically dry humping me and said joked about fucking me in the ass to which I said back off (except i wasn't that polite about it). I know he's my brother and it may seem like harmless teasing but did he molest me?

selfcareafterrape:

Typically molestation is used in reference of minors. (Or at least- what I’ve seen of it)

But what you’re saying- could definitely fall under the category of sexual assault.

He’s your brother. which makes it all the more harmful. Family shouldn’t joke about fucking you (or- lets be real, raping you. because it’s not like he’s talking about getting consent. no, he was joking about violating you.)

You have every right to be extremely upset about this.

You have every right to be hurt over this.

What feelings you are feeling?

are valid.

Too often harmful things are written off because it is a family member that does them but.. being family doesn’t make it okay.

it can make it hurt worse. because you have to see these people all the time- and you’re supposed to trust them. but when they do things like that? it doesn’t make them worthy of trust.

April182014

Anonymous asked: The more I learn about consent, rape culture and those issues, the more I think back to conversations I had with my girl friends and realize they have been assaulted too but think it was just a bad sexual experience because neither them or I were educated on enthusiastic consent and what constitutes rape... and there are girls I don't speak to anymore and I just wish I still had a mean to contact them and give them the info I now have so they can process the trauma. ( part 1 / 2 )

selfcareafterrape:

(part 2 / 2) I know I didn’t process it until I was able to call it by its name, and yet it was ruining my mental health all along, with dissociation and other ptsd symptoms. Back then, some of them blamed their mixed feelings on past sexual abuses that fell into what they (we) felt was undeniably abuse and I just…I wish I’d known as much as I know now.I wish I’d been able then to infuse the idea that it wasn’t consensual and the guy was a shithead rapist. Fucking rape culture blinding us all

———————————————————————-

It can be so hard to look back and realize the moments that.. if we knew then what we knew now.. we could have done so much.

It’s so important that we talk to young people about consent. and especially consent out of the bedroom. and talk about sex in ways that aren’t just ‘don’t do it!!! you’ll get stds and die’ and don’t shame people for having sexual feelings. We need to talk about better ways to deal with this. 

I think the biggest thing is just.. to remember that you can’t change the past- but you can help people now. and if someone told you those things now- you’d know what to do.

April92014
1PM
your-lies-ruin-lives:

So picture this. You are raped, and fall pregnant. You decide to carry it through and want the rapist, who is awaiting further legal proceedings to be put behind bars, to sign off rights. He now has a bargaining chip to stay out of prison because he can say,”Drop charges, help get me free and I’ll sign it.” or you’re stuck with him for life. You’re stuck with him being able to request visitation. When he gets out of jail, he’ll be allowed to petition for actual visits. But if you let him go free, you get your relinquishment form signed. Welcome to America. 

your-lies-ruin-lives:

So picture this. 

You are raped, and fall pregnant. You decide to carry it through and want the rapist, who is awaiting further legal proceedings to be put behind bars, to sign off rights. He now has a bargaining chip to stay out of prison because he can say,”Drop charges, help get me free and I’ll sign it.” or you’re stuck with him for life. You’re stuck with him being able to request visitation. When he gets out of jail, he’ll be allowed to petition for actual visits. But if you let him go free, you get your relinquishment form signed. 

Welcome to America. 

(Source: weprochoicefeminists, via thetribalmoth)

April12014
1PM
March312014

thetomska:

policymic:

Do you still need more proof of rape culture?

As Noam Chomsky once pointed out for Z Magazine, old media types from the institutional bodies like American Enterprise Institute tend to regurgitate the same ideas with a reliability that is equally impressive and infuriating. While assuring the public that rape is a terrible crime, writers like Caroline Kitchens and Heather McDonald of right-wing think tank The Manhattan Institute try to claim that feminists have blown this whole rape culture thing way out of proportion.

Apparently, many women disagree. On Tuesday there were more than 1 million responses on the #RapeCultureIsWhen hashtag started by a frustrated Zerlina Maxwell in response to these right-wing narratives. 

Read moreFollow policymic

That last one. What the fuck, Facebook? :/

11AM

dykeprivilege:

policymic:

Courageous women speak out against corrective rape

Grace Brown has photographed hundreds of survivors and received submissions from thousands more since starting Project Unbreakable in October 2011. Her images document the threatening, demeaning and downright misguided comments that sexual abusers use to torment and subdue their victims.

Some pictures capture a particularly haunting aspect of sexual victimization: so-called “corrective rape,” a hate crime used against LGBT people as punishment or in the belief that forcing them to have heterosexual sex will “cure” them of their homosexuality.

Read moreFollow @policymic

Corrective rape happens in every country we need to stop acting as if it’s restricted to countries that fit into the narrative of ‘backwards’ countries.

(via thetribalmoth)

March192014
11AM

i-once-had-a-guy-tell-me:

[TW Rape]

I once had a guy tell me that while rape jokes may not be funny to me, they’re funny to other people and I shouldn’t get so mad when people joke around about it. This man was my dad. I don’t think he understands that I’ve been raped before and these “jokes” are triggering to me.

(submitted by breadia)

March182014

i-once-had-a-guy-tell-me:

I once had a old guy corner me in the store I was working in and tell me he wanted to take photos and make pornography with me. After being persuaded by my manager to make a statement, I was told by the policeman that it was harmless and to get over it. He didn’t record the statement.

(submitted by anonymous)

March52014

i-once-had-a-guy-tell-me:

[TW Sexual Assault]

I once had a guy tell me that since I was wearing a tank top, it was fine for him to pull off my shirt. I was wearing a sports bra, and almost got suspended at school for him ripping my shirt off. He walked away without a warning, meanwhile I was given unofficial detention.

(submitted by anonymous)

February272014

Look at how poor female survivors of sex trafficking are treated: 45 out of 50 states refuse to expunge/vacate our prostitution arrest records, which employers then use to deny us chances for jobs. Lawmakers know that this holds us back from being able to get ANY job at all so we can rebuild our lives and emotionally heal, and get on our feet to support ourselves - thanks to Welfare Reform, there is NO adequate economic safety net for unemployable destitute, marginalized women.

This is what pimps mean when they tell their victims, “Once a whore, always a whore.” Pimps KNOW that society has allowed poor throw-away women and girls NO OTHER PLACE except the gutter and an early grave (life expectancy rate for poor sex trafficking survivors in the US is 34 yrs old), and that those of us who survived and escaped prostitution by sheer luck are NOT treated very nicely by everybody else.

Jacqueline Homan (via hayleystarkftw)

(via misandry-mermaid)

February242014

rhrealitycheck:

feministbecky:

peroquevaina:

(I like that this has no gender pronouns, too.)

I like that the person asking for sex isn’t pissed off.

This is great.

(Source: geekstuffandranting, via thetribalmoth)

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